“All of us are engaged in the ongoing process of cultivating our gardens – digging out the weeds and nurturing the plants we hope will flourish. Often it’s a joyful experience; always it’s deeply personal.” (Come as you Are by Emily Nagoski)
I suggest going to your local library/bookstore and picking up this book boldly. Don’t furtively peer around to check if anyone has seen you. Don’t hide it under your coat until you reach the checkout desk. Do not, under any circumstances, avoid looking at the checkout person. And if that checkout person happens to leer, laugh, or glance up suspiciously, you can feel free to look down on them from your superior height of enlightened feminism.
This book is 1/2 scientific research into female sexuality and 1/2 pseudo-psychology self-help. Fortunately for us, Nagoski first lays out the research uninterpreted, so that we readers can form our own conclusions, and only later layers on her philosophy. Though the self help part is rather inspirational, using wonderful metaphors about a woman’s ‘garden’ and repeatedly telling the reader that she is normal, you really come to this book for the research, which is fascinating, unintuitive, and deftly explained in Nagoski’s casual, bright style.